Kat's Blog

anniversary

Moving on
is hard
for someone
so sentimental
as myself

And as i find
myself embedded
in the contemplation
of my day
i lay awake

exhausted, but
restless
a deep insomnia
not of the body
but of the soul

i hold onto her
still
i miss her
so
so much

i wonder why she left me.
was it my fault
i knew it was going to end
but still
it aches so much so

things have changed
since you left
its gotten better
at least so
i hope

there are things
in this world
to be so pretty as
to break
one's heart

and every time
i see you
it hurts
more than my
physical pains

i know i ought
to let go of
you.
but maybe i don't
want to

lest i forget
as all things fade
with the
slow trickle
of time

all that remains
of her soft lips
a warm euphoria
washing over us
locked in an embrace

but ultimately ephemeral
i left for my motel room
memories of colors
shapes and form
on that damp spring night

and we never had
that third time together
it stung like a needle
but the ache of injection
that lingers

but time rolls on
irrespective of my sentiments
seeing you again, just isn't
the same as it once was
its time to move on

its been a year now
and maybe, i am over you
but i have a nasty habit
of picking at my wounds and relishing in the fresh blood

so angry
so tired
so heartbroken
so jaded
so

scars cover
what once bled
and i look there
reminded every time
as i run my finger over

maybe i am happy now.